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We’ve updated our Terms of Use. You can review the changes here.

Hands

by Chris Crabtree

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about

Viruses and germs are not the problem. The problem is hands. The problem is the majority of people don't wash them. The problem is disgusting hands touching handles and other points of shared contact. This song is about hands.

lyrics

53% of Americans don't wash their hands after they take a dump
How many of them do you think wash up after they masturbate?
Didn't think so.
Excuse me if I don't want to touch your shit-wiping, jerk-off hand!

Why shake hands when I could shake your ass?
Why shake hands when I could shake your ass?
Why shake hands when I could shake your ass?
Why shake hands when I could shake your ass?
Why shake hands when I could shake your ass?

credits

released March 23, 2020
Chris Crabtree is responsible for this entire mess.

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all rights reserved

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about

Chris Crabtree Kansas City, Kansas

Chris Crabtree is a Kansas City singer-songwriter originally hailing from the sagebrush plains of Texas. He released his first rock album, Counterfeit Heart, in 2015. That record served as a soundtrack to his novel, Zen and the Art of Killing Your Self, also released at the same time. His music draws from the sounds of Ryan Adams, Daniel Lanois, Tom Petty, Bruce Springsteen, U2, and Bob Dylan. ... more

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